The Origin Of Slender
by Haylie Hatsuki
Summary: Living in a small town Slender grows up along with his hurtful peers who bully him abusively for fun every day. And while sharing a secret relationship with his crush Elizabeth, he starts to have thoughts and feelings he's never had before, but they are not lustful ones. (Prequel to my fanfiction: Slenderman)
1. Chapter 1

Why...? I peer out the window of the school. Why was I born this way? Everyone else looks in a mirror and gets to see a face. A unique face with traits of all different sorts. You know what I see, I see nothing, for I have not single trait from my mother nor father. I'm an unfinished picture and I always will be.

I turn my head to the teacher who was almost finished with her lecture at the front of the class. I was placed in the very back so I didn't bother or distract any of the other students. The school bell rings announcing for everyone to leave for the day. Two of the students give me a scornful look as they leave. I wait for everyone to depart before grabbing my own stuff and doing the same. I leave the classroom and head to the front doors of the school. Other students from other classes also walk along. I hear them whisper about me. I head down the steps as other students peer over at me. I stop in my tracks making the group behind me nervously go around. A girl with red hair walks past me out of the school immediately catching my attention. She continues on her way as I find myself unable to avert my gaze. She was my crush.

I lower my head and continue on my way when someone suddenly kicks me to the ground. I'm gripped by my collar and brought up to a male student's face. "Don't you dare look at her again." The boy glares at me with anger and disgust before dropping me to the ground. Walking away everyone stares down at me like I'm some bug that he had just squashed. Silently I grab my school book that had fallen and stand back up.

Back at home my parents greet me with happy smiles as always. But this time my parents both held something behind their backs.

"We got you something!" Says my father excitedly. My mother then hands me a thin present from behind her with purple wrapping and a yellow bow.

"Surprise! Happy early birthday!" They say at the same time. I take the present with one hand and look it over.

"Come on! Open it up." Insists my dad. I untie the bow around it and let it fall to the ground now ripping open the present. It was a journal. My father hands me a small pencil from behind his back. "Now you can write down all your ideas!" We're poor so they only get me stuff like this on special occasions.

"Thank you." I say simply putting my school book down by the door now holding the new journal at my side. "I'll be back." I grip the door knob and walk back out.

"Come back soon." Says my mother from inside the house.

I stand at the entrance. I could write here, but I'd rather find an isolated place. Staring over at the houses across the dirt road I raise my head to the large trees that grew behind them, a forest stood. I head there without a second thought.

The forest had a different feeling than I expected it to have. Wondering forward I look up at the branches above me as the sound of dead leaves crunched underneath my feet. Beams of light peered through the trees flashing on me every once in awhile. Birds chirped jumping from branch to branch. A warm breeze found its way through, picking up some of the leaves off the ground and making them dance in mid air. Finding a considerable spot against a tree I sit down with my journal and open up to the first page.

Instead of writing, I drew a circle representing my head but stop myself before drawing eyes. Oh yeah... I cross out the circle and close the book. Leaning against the tree I watch the birds play happily. I stretch my hand out up at the sky when one of the birds come flying towards me and lands on my finger.

"You're not scared of me?" I ask lowering my hand as it jumped from side to side. Students at the school would scare off the birds that had landed on the ground. They flew away before the kids had even gotten all that close. Another bird then came down startling the other one as it landed on my thumb. They both looked at each other before flying away.

The sun soon fell and the moon soon rose. At the dinner table both my parents were talking about their day. They act with joy around me but you can tell in their eyes that they're scared of me. I can only imagine their reactions when I was born.

"And how was your day?" My dad asks turning his head to me as I played with my food. I don't want to eat, mainly because I hate the way they look at me when I open my mouth. Yes, I do have a mouth, a mouth with abnormally sharp teeth.

"Birds aren't scared of me." I state after thinking of something to say.

"Is that so?" My dad sounded interested but was cut off by my mother who asked why I hadn't eaten yet. The thing is, I can't taste anything. Ever since I was young, it's all been tasteless. I never said anything because I wanted to fit it.

"I can't taste it." I admit for the first time.

"What? ...Oh no, Henry, do you think he's sick?" She looks back to me. "Don't worry sweetie, It will come back." I stand up from the table infuriated.

"It's always tasted that way. I can't taste anything." They look up at me in surprise with a hint of fear for they were now speechless. I leave the room. Food has never 'filled me up,' nor have I ever felt hungry. I just ate when they told me to. I've never gotten sick and whenever I get hurt I would just heal in seconds. Locking my door I jump on my bed and sit all the way against the wall. Seeing my journal on the table across the room I get up quickly to go grab it as well as the pencil. Sitting back down I open up to the first page and write "Slender's" above the crossed out circle and "Journal" below. Slender's Journal.

The next day I came in early as usual because I felt safer in the teacher's sight where the bullies can't hurt me. Even though the teacher felt the complete opposite. With nothing else to do I ended up writing a small letter to my crush in my new journal. Once I was finished I teared the letter out and folded it up. Coming up to the teacher at the front of the room I ask her if she has an envelope I can use.

"Were you writing a letter back there?" She asks happily pulling one out from her desk.

"Sort of." I answer. She hands me the envelope. "Um..."

"Hm?"

"Who's the girl with the red hair?" I feel embarrassed because I never bothered to find out her name.

"Oh! Elizabeth?"

"I think so, which desk is her's...?"

"That one over there." She points at a desk near the front of the class. Walking over to the one I thought she was referring to I gesture at it. "Yes, that's the one."

Opening the envelope I slide the letter in. Turning it around I write: "To: Elizabeth" and below it: "From:" What should I write for the name...? Thinking of something I write down: "Your Secret Admirer" I don't care who she thinks it's from. As long as she knows someone out there l-likes her, that's fine by me. I slide the envelope in the desk and run back to my own. About ten minutes later, other students started to show up. I feel anxious at the thought of Elizabeth finding the envelope. Eventually she comes in with a couple of her friends. A sudden strike of nervousness comes over me and I leave the room in a hurry. I head outside the school where other kids hung out as they waited for the bell to ring.

Suddenly someone runs into me as we both fall to the ground. "I'm so sorry-!" She gets up but as soon as she sees me she sprints off. I watch her run away as I get up feeling disappointed. But someone knees me hard in the stomach making me fall once again.

"Whoops." Says the same boy from yesterday in a sarcastic tone. I attempt to get up. "You're so weird." He says in mockery pushing me completely down with his foot. I glare up at him to see two other students with him. He gives a chuckle before kicking me incredibly hard in the neck. Ripping open my skin that covered over my mouth I reveal my sharp teeth and choke in pain holding my neck. "Wow! So it does have a mouth!" He backs away as I sit up and grit my teeth at them. "Only animals have as sharp as teeth as you'res!" He looks down at me in amusement as I steadily start to stand back up sealing up my mouth. Yet the moment I was up all the way he punches me causing me to fall back on the school wall. "Fight me already!" I'm not fighting him, there's no way I'm fighting him. But what other choice do I have?

Standing, I take a step forward and clench my fists at my sides. He laughs coming at me. But this time not with his fist, instead he raises his leg in the air and kicks me back causing me to fall with a thud. It hurts to be kicked around, it hurts to be punched, even if it does heal. I hate it and I hate them. He curses down at me yelling for me to stand back up. I won't stand. I won't fight. He'll just push me down again. Not doing anything just angered him more as he stomps over to me. I put my hands up but, I was too slow. Suddenly everything goes black but returns moments later. I had gone unconscious yet, I could still hear his rampage of words being thrown at me. I rise up and feel a terrible pain coming from my head. I put my hand over the pain feeling an awful sting. I take a look at my hand to see the color black. They went quiet when they saw it too. The color I bled was inhuman. "Freak!" They run off as it healed.

This was my life. A bullies prey, an outsider, with a hopeless crush my days are filled with fake smiles.


	2. Chapter 2

~Two Years Later~

Each day was similar. I got beat regularly. Hid regularly. Avoided regularly. The only thing that really made up for it was getting to read Elizabeth's letters each day. Ever since the 8th grade when I put that letter in her desk, it just somehow became a thing between us. I'm not sure how it really started but, It grew on me, being her secret admirer. That day two years ago she put a reply letter in her desk, I found it the next day when I went to check to see if she had taken it or not. We then just continued sending letters back and forth through her desk. I did my best not to seem suspicious of being him around her and she never found out. It was the only happiness I had, listening to her small problems which didn't compare to mine was nice to think she was sharing it with me. She shared everything with me. But this happy feeling was always kicked or knocked out of me by the end of the day. It became a game for them. Hitting me down repeatedly as I just stood up repeatedly, for I never fought back. Bruises took longer to heal and so did cuts. It was painful and I always wished I could make them feel what I had to feel each day. But I never did. It's always the same boy as his group seems to grow larger by the week. They threaten me telling me not to tattle, but I never really knew what they meant by that.

Days became worse but stayed the same. I'm now the tallest student in the school but even my height doesn't scare off those bullies. I've gotten skinnier too which I assume is from not eating a lot. I still visit the forest near the town regularly. The only place where I find peace in all the chaos.

Elizabeth said in one of her letters that I've been recently writing with harsher words than usual. She asked me if there was anything wrong. I lied of course; She's the last person I want to worry.

I think... I've fallen in love with Elizabeth. I still fear the day she asks me when we can meet in person. I'm sure it will break her heart to find out it was me all along. It was the freak in the back of the class. The weirdo no one likes or talks to. The aberration with no face...

Already on the ground, I hold onto my stomach as the pain vanishes yet, I'm kicked again in the shoulder with far more force than the last. Ripping open my mouth I let out a yelp in defeat as I hold desperately onto where he kicked. Oh please heal quickly. I'm a faster healer than I was two years ago but they're also stronger than they were so there's really no difference. "You're a freak Slender." William says. Slender. That's right, I snuck into the school and hospital records and changed my name entirely. Soon enough I was able to get most of my peers to address me this way, well at least just the ones who will talk to me or talk about me. "How much you wanna bet I couldn't even kill you if I tried." He says taking out a switch blade.

"Those aren't aloud..." I barely say.

"Shut up." He kneels beside me while pinching my jaw up at him; his knee resting on my arm. Adjusting the knife in his hand he brings it to my forehead. Scared of getting cut I squirm and try to move away but he holds me down. "Stop moving you twit." He places the knife on my head and starts slicing in. In a shaking frantic I jolt my head away but that only creates a worse cut. Jumping off of me he allows me to turn around and take hold of the cut. The stinging sensation was unbearable. I end up letting out small crys but still do my best to keep them in. Taking one hand away I look at the color blood. Black again. Still black I mean. I'm still stuck in my fake little world where I think I'll eventually heal with age. By heal I mean of course, become human.

Dammit... why am I so different? I really am a freak, aren't I?

"Hey!" Suddenly a girl screams in our direction. I let myself take a quick glimpse at who it was. It was Elizabeth. "William! Stop this! It's getting out of hand!"

"Come on now Elizabeth, we're just having some fun," He walks over to her but then looks back at me. "Right Slendy?" Sitting up I say nothing. "See, he's fine." He was right on some levels. My cut was already on the verge of healing, but my feelings though will never be. I lower my head but end up missing something I would have enjoyed to had seen because, Elizabeth at that moment, had slapped William. He raises his hand to hit her back but stops midway in the air. Slowly yet surely he lowers his hand back down to his side. See, William and I both have something in common. We're both in love with dear Elizabeth. "Whatever, you can have him." He says heading on his way. William's one weakness was also my only savior at times like these. But even so, I can never let her know that I'm the one sending the letters. My wound by then had retracted the blood and healed entirely.

"Are you alright?" Elizabeth asked, for I was distracted from watching his retreat. I look to her but don't say a word. She fearlessly takes a couple steps closer suddenly making me realize something. Everyone is scared to come near me expect, Elizabeth and William. But both for completely different reasons. Holding out her hand to me she waits impatiently for my hand too. If a response is what you want then sorry Elizabeth but, I don't think I'll ever have one. "Oh come on!" She starts as if she had been reading my mind. "You always do this! Why won't you ever take my hand?" ...I "And you never respond either." I continue to stare up at her. She gives out a sigh raising back up. "Well... I guess I'll see you tomorrow." She looks down at me for just a bit longer before turning and walking off. She never speaks about William's behavior around me, not even when we're alone. I stand back up, but not in a hurry. Grabbing my discarded books off the ground I head to the forest.

A single bird on my shoulder I open my book to the front page. And as before it still says the same thing. "Slender's Journal" I soon become very fond of the crossed out circle in the middle and started drawing it more often. Sometimes before handing in a test I'd quickly draw it at the bottom or beforehand at the top next to my name. Her reaction is priceless. That's another thing- In the past year I've found joy in scaring people. I don't know why... it's just fun. My only fun. How ironic... two years ago I hated the feared look everyone gave me but now, I long for it in everyone's eyes. Expect Elizabeth that is, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if she was scared of me. Though I would love it if William and his friends were.

...Even though it says Slender's Journal, it's not much of a journal at all. My love for scaring people has become more abstract and I've found myself writing lots of menacing messages instead. They even scare me just going through them all. I'm not sure what to do with them though... I open to the second page. This is an older book, my first actually. So the drawings aren't very good. I tried drawing myself, but taller; a lot taller. I think if I were super tall everyone would be more afraid of me. And somehow my dream has come true. The only trait I like about myself, in fact... I keep getting taller. I don't know if it's a trait or just another aspect of my aberated self but even so, I love it.

The bird on my shoulder continues its loud song unfearful of me. I think I've figured out why the birds aren't scared of me. Their scared of faces.

"Are you scared of faces?" I ask the bird knowing it'll only respond with more loud notes. "Well, so am I." ...Expect Elizabeth's though... She has the most... lovely face. I shake my head attempting to rid it of the embarrassing thoughts. I end up startling the bird making it fly away. "Come back-!" But it was too late, it had already went to join it's friends among the leaves. Friends... I don't need friends. I look down at my book again. Taking my pencil I sharpen out the edges on the shoulders and lengthen the arms. More sketchy, more scary, less people. I write the word "NO" on each side six times vertically. Perfect, that could scare anyone off. Oh, wait. That's perfect. I stand up while grabbing my other two books off the ground and head home.

Dropping my books in the small front yard of the house I scoot them behind a bush. Going around the house I see my father working on something wooden with a hammer and nails.

"Father." He turns around and smiles.

"There you are. How was school?"

"Normal. Um, can I please borrow the hammer and nails for a bit?"

"What for son?"

"Um... Just for something."

"Well I'm working on a new door here so you're gonna have to wait."

"What? Did the door break...? I didn't notice."

"Yeah, well don't open it. It'll fall right off it's hinges and then to pieces. Just go through the back door from now on until I get it fixed." I guess this means I won't be able to put the messages up on the trees for awhile. I was hoping to put them around the front of the forest so no one would come inside. Then that way I could have the forest truly all to myself. Disappointed I head back around and get all three books from behind the small bush. The window to my room reflected my blank face back at me. I don't need the back door. Opening my window I hop through and into my room. I take out a piece of paper from my pocket. Time to reply to Elizabeth's letter.


	3. Chapter 3

"_Dearest Admirer,_

_Everyday it feels more and more like you're my only friend. And I've always been patient when it came to seeing you. I understand your desire to keep your identity hidden from me but, it's been two years. I don't know how much longer I can wait. Before, I was scared that you would end up being someone I detest but I was even more scared of you being someone I didn't even know. That has all changed. And I've been nervous to ask again because I still have the letters from your previous responses. I know you don't want me to know and that, that was the reason of the letters in the first place. But I can only be patient for so long love. I'm worried someone might steel me away. Because truthfully, the only one I want steeling me away, is you. I don't care what you look like. I love you, and that is the honest truth._

_Sincerely, Elizabeth_"

She's at it again. It really has become something I can't run away from... Elizabeth's desire to know who I am is as strong as my desire for her not to know. We can't keep this up. _I_ can't keep this up. After so many times she's asked in the past, how could I bring myself to tell her off again? I'm just... causing her pain, aren't I? What do I do now? I want to believe in her words; I want to believe in Elizabeth, but how can I? She doesn't understand, she doesn't understand at all. I'm a faceless person, she could never love me. Not like this... If Elizabeth and I were to be together, I'm afraid the bullying may translate to her. I wouldn't be able to forgive myself. If even a scratch came to her because of me... I won't have it.

Opening up the drawer by my bed I grab a fresh piece of paper and sit down at my small wooden desk.

"_Dear Elizabeth,_" ...

I stop there. A lot of time passes which start to seem like forever. How am I supposed to tell her? Again?

"_Dear Elizabeth,_

_I'm sorry, but_"

I stop again. After erasing I just end up writing the same thing over. I erase again.

How? How can I tell her 'I love you too but, no.' No, I'm not writing that, so... what am I supposed to do? I can't wait a day like she does, then she'd know something was wrong. It's fine if she needs time to think about her letter, but not me. We both know how I am with the responses; I always reply within a days time. I'd trouble her if I took any longer than that. So what am I supposed to do? For the first time... I really need to think about this.

The next day I found myself staring intently at Elizabeth's desk. Where my letter should be, sat nothing. And there she comes, her friends trailing in right behind. Now all I can do is hope, hope she doesn't mind, hope she won't care, hope she'll be understanding. I'm sorry Elizabeth but, I couldn't get the letter to you today.

As she laughs with her friends her hand, that only I notice, slyly searches for my reply letter in her desk. But she can't find it. She doesn't feel it. She had no choice but to bend over and look for it. Her face... please don't make that face. Elizabeth, please don't look so heart broken. I couldn't get it to you! I'm sorry! I want to yell out, I want to tell her why, but I can't. She forces on a fake smile, continuously making it seem like nothing's wrong around her two close friends. But they don't know. They would never know of the intimate relationship between Elizabeth and I. She walks out, unable to look up at her friends as they keep talking. Talking about something she no longer cares about. The very moment I can't hear her anymore I throw out the unfinished letter that I got nowhere close to starting yesterday.

"_Dear Elizabeth,_

_I'm sorry I've kept you waiting for so long. I've been stubborn and unreasonable. If you want to know who I am, meet me at the end of the day, behind the school._

_Sincerely, Your Secret Admirer._"

Folding it once I jump up out of my seat and dash to Elizabeth's desk. Throwing the letter in, the school bell starts to ring. It was too late. Turning around she already stood there; staring wide-eyed with her friends. My stomach caves in as my hands grip her desk behind me. I tense up. The one time I don't have the letter in time... this can't be happening.

She doesn't say a word.

"What is he doing at your desk Elizabeth?" One of her friends, Mary, leans in to ask her.

"Ugh, someone get him away." The other, Sarah, comments bluntly. But Elizabeth continues to say nothing and just stares at me. Not with anger nor sadness. Letting go of her desk, the white letter now plainly sitting near the entrance inside, I run. Past Elizabeth, past her friends and out of the school. My whole body shaking, I run around the school to the very back like I wrote on the letter. It was the only place I could think to go.

Elizabeth, she knows. She knows now. There's no going back. I can't hide anymore. She saw me put the letter in her desk. And when she reads it, she'll recognize my hand writing. She'll know that it was the white faceless boy who wrote: "Sincerely, Your Secret Admirer." So, so many times.

Finally coming to a slow stop I sit down against the brick wall of the school. Eventually, when I stop shaking I realize that I had left my books on my desk. But I can't bring myself to go back to class; to go back to school. I'd much rather just sit here and wait to get rejected. To be told: "Sorry, I can't-" or however way she ends up telling me. Though, I'd rather not think about it too much. And after this... will we ever send each other letters again through her desk? Will that be it? I'll never get to read her words again... about what she's feeling or how to deal with something. I'll never get to give her another letter. My hands that were holding my knees flinch. My very white hands and transparent nails that were inhumanly flawless start to grip my legs. I'll never get to give her another letter... Another letter... But I guess... I should be grateful enough for this. To have gotten to talk with her in anyway at all. To have been someone special to her. To have been her "Secret Admirer." I was her Secret Admirer. And I'm sure that even after all of this, secret or not, I still will be.

Ba-dump... The sun's position has changed. Ba-dump... The bell has rung. Students exit the school. Ba-dump... How long will it be-? Ba-dump. -until sh gets here?

Ba-dump...

Ba-dump... But then, a sudden-

Thump. I raise my head that had been in my arms. My books now lay beside me on the dirt they had picked up; and someone's feet just in my range of vision. Elizabeth's school shoes that suited her unlike the other girls. She stood in front of me, looking down on me. Too embarrassed to look at her face I put my head back down.

"You forgot something." She states. She brought my books to me. I can't bring myself to say even a word. "Are you him?" She asks. I hear her take out a piece of paper. She kneels down and when I look, she's holding up the last letter I gave her. "Are you my secret admirer?" I start to freeze up. There's no running away, not anymore.

"...Yes." And for the first time, I answer one of Elizabeth's questions.

Gradually she stands back up and... starts to rip up the note, throwing it aside as the wind picked it up. I get up quickly. "Elizabeth-" She looks at me. "Do you want me to stay away from you?" Suddenly, after I say this Elizabeth grabs my collar while pulling me down to her face and-... kisses me.

Her soft lips, were being placed on my non-existent mouth.

My hands- hovering above her thin waist were unsure of where they should rest.

I don't have the right to touch her at a moment like this. So what am I supposed to do?

I want to kiss her back.

I want to hold her. I want... a normal mouth to kiss with.

Slowly she loosens her grip on my collar, giving room between our faces. Her expression... I felt as though it was filled with slight lust. Even now, Elizabeth still loves me. Taking my hand she intertwines our fingers together.

"We're dating now, okay?" She smiled; I froze.

"How-... how can you say that... after you've found out who I am...?" My voice was shaking as each word came out.

"Did you even read the last letter I wrote?" Of course, her letter... I pull it out of my pocket. She snatches it out of my grip. Letting go of my hand she starts to read over the note as if looking for a specific sentence. "I'm worried someone might steal me away." She starts. "Because truthfully-" She looks away from the letter and up at me. "-the only one I want stealing me away, is you." I remember this line. "I don't care what you look like." She states stubbornly, inching closer to me. Nervously I back away, but it's not long until my back is up against the school wall. She takes a sad breath and places her hands on my chest with the letter. I didn't realize till now that I've been keeping her waiting for far longer than I realized. "I know..." She says slowly. "You don't want me to know and that that was the purpose of the letters in the first place..."

Elizabeth... is she... going to cry? "But it's been two years..." She's still reciting sentences from the letter, just in a different order. For her to remember word for word, she must have really thought about this letter. "I'm scared..." She starts to choke up on her words. Placing herself closer she lays her head on my chest. She wants me to hold her... I can tell. Somethings telling me, screaming at me, to hold her. "I'm scared someone might steal me away." In the letter and before she said she was worried. Is this what she's really feeling? Fear...? And as though it was her last breath she finally says, "I love you." in a choking cry. My arms that had been hovering nervously around her, in a quick moment, finally embrace her. Elizabeth... I never knew. I've done something terrible to her. In all my days of feeling strongly for her, I always wanted her to love me back. And now, through the cruelest and most cowardly way possible, I've made her fall in love with me.


End file.
